redwoman
This has not been a very good week.
My 18 year old son took his car that we had just given him on Saturday afternoon, and rolled it over on a dirt road into a ravine. He had the car 3 hours. He has waited so long for that car. That car meant freedom and independence. It looked so pretty sitting in the driveway, he was so happy to get it and we were so happy to be able to help him out. He is working part time and going to school, and we wanted to give him a break and get him a car. It's totalled and in the junk yard now. I drove out Saturday night and picked him and his friend up and waited for the tow truck to get the car out of the ravine. All I could do that night was grab that boy and hug him and hold him, so grateful he was alive and uninjured. Lately all I can do is feel mad and angry with him for making such a bad decision. He went out after dark on a road he was unfamiliar with in a car he was unfamiliar with, and admitted he was driving too fast on a dirt road and slid. I think I am not so mad about the car as I am him making such a poor decision. It scares me. I thought he was ready for some responsiblity. He wasn't, he acted like a kid. Now I am not sure he is ready for alot of things. Will he make more stupid choices? Of course he will. It scares me to death and fills my heart and soul with fear. I can't protect him. That is the part I am the most mad about I guess. Up until now I could control alot of things in his life, I could keep him safe, keep the boogie man away. I really can't do that anymore. And I remember being that age and clueless too. I remember driving to the River in my first car, in the middle of the night with my girlfriend about 90 miles an hour and passing people like crazy, just having a blast. ( No triple A card or anything! ) I survived being young and all I can really do is PRAY he will too.
2 comments:
Wow, thank God he's okay. That must have been terrifying, for you and him. While I'm sure he'll get himself into other bad situations, I have to believe that all the common sense and values you instilled in him over the years didn't disappear overnight.
Hang in there, we all have to learn the hard way ;)
Good Morning Redwoman
Thank you for leaving a note on my blog. This is day 3 of a terrible cold that is going around. I was up all night coughing a rumbling cough like an old pirate.
You and I must be about the same age. If I'd been blessed with kids, they would be about 18 now.
You must be very shaken. My first thought was "I'm glad he's ok." My second thought was, "I'm glad he didn't hurt anyone." A friend of mine was permanently disabled by an accident caused by a careless teen driver.
It sounds like you are creative and spiritual enough to come up with a consequence that will hold a lot of meaning for him.
It's funny about the scarf. I do the same thing! My neck gets cold, but my feet don't. If you are following our chakra discussion you will find some significance in the scarf.
Post a Comment